I don't want to

Walking with my daughter is fun. More than fun, actually. It's heartwarming.

Miriam's demeanor is one of sweetness and sugar.

She says "hi" to everyone she crosses in a dreamy, breathless, high-pitched girly voice.

She kisses the animals that are intended to be climbed on at the indoor playgrounds. Which makes the germiphobe spring to life in me.

She hugs other kids her age and smiles at them not even two inches away from their nose. Most kids don't know what to make of her and look over their shoulders for their mom to explain to them why the blonde girl with pigtails is trying to touch them and babbling in her own language; which she is just convinced means something like, " I am so glad we are friends now." They then walk away from her and she giggles, waves and says, "bye bye." She then usually calls, "Mommy" and comes running to me. Then she babbles to me about her new friend, knowing that her mama understands her completely.

I cherish her.

But, everytime we leave a public place and I watch the adults around us smile and wave back at my friendly, loving daughter, I cringe inside. Because I know that there will come a time when I have to tell her that she can't give everyone hugs. She can't go up to a stranger who looks sad and give them a kiss on the nose to feel better. Because not everyone is nice. And not everyone is good. And we live in a world full of sin.

It fills me with sadness because I don't want to.

I don't want to tell her that there are big people out there who may want to hurt her.

I don't want to tell her that she can only smile and say hi to everyone when Mommy and Daddy are there with her.

I don't want to cause her fear or sadness or anything that may take even a piece of her sweet spirit away.

I just don't want to.

But, I suppose that whatever sadness I am feeling about the sin Miriam will have to understand......God feels it even more. How sad must He be?

It affords me an interesting opportunity to explain to my innocent daughter the love Christ has for us and the sin He never intended for us to live with.

I will explain to her that loving everyone is what God wants her to do, but she will have to be cautious.

I will tell her of how God has a child, too. And He came to show love to the whole world. He loves her and wants her to love others like He does.

But, I will also explain that He died for her.

And for me.

And for everyone.

And that the reason He had to die is the same reason that she can't talk to strangers.

I'll tell her all those things.

But, I really don't want to.